Why Your Toddler is Fighting Sleep (And How You Can Help)

Nicole Jayawickreme
Dec 29, 2025
3 min read

If your toddler is fighting sleep, you’re likely spending your evenings dodging stalling tactics, emotional outbursts, and endless requests for "one more story." Sound familiar?

You are so not alone.

This is one of the most common (and yes, most exhausting) sleep challenges parents face. And the good news? There are gentle, effective ways to help your little one wind down and drift off peacefully.

Let’s dig into why this is happening and what you can do to bring calm back to bedtime.

Why Is Your Toddler Fighting Sleep?

Sleep is supposed to be a peaceful end to the day, but for many toddlers, it feels more like a battleground. Here are a few common reasons your little one might be resisting rest:

🧪 They’re testing boundaries.

Toddlers are curious, determined, and wildly independent. Pushing back at bedtime is often their way of seeing where the limits are and whether they can move them.

😢 Separation anxiety strikes again.

Even if they’ve been independent all day, the idea of separating from you for the night can feel big and scary. That clingy behaviour? It’s love in disguise.

⚡ They’re overtired or not tired enough.

Timing matters. If bedtime is too early or too late, their little bodies may not be ready for rest or they may be too wired to settle down. If they take a nap, the time and length will also play a huge role in bedtime and overnight sleep.

😍 They have FOMO (Fear of Missing Out).

Life is so exciting when you’re a toddler. They might resist sleep simply because they don’t want to miss out on anything even if it’s just you doing dishes or watching TV.

How to Help When Your Toddler Is Fighting Sleep

This part’s all about gentle guidance, connection, and consistency. Here’s how to shift bedtime from chaos to calm.

🛁 Create a soothing bedtime routine.

A predictable, relaxing routine helps signal to your toddler’s brain that it’s time to slow down. Think warm bath, pyjamas, a couple of stories, cuddles, and lights out. Keep it simple and cosy.

🕰️ Time bedtime just right.

Watch for sleepy signs like rubbing eyes, yawning, or getting extra clingy. Try to start your routine before they become overtired to avoid second winds and meltdowns.

📚 Offer choices within limits.

Let them choose between two sets of pyjamas or pick one of two bedtime stories. This helps them feel in control without turning bedtime into a negotiation.

🤗 Fill their connection cup.

Spend a few minutes of one-on-one time before lights out sing a special song, share a quiet moment, or talk about their favourite part of the day. When toddlers feel emotionally full, they’re less likely to fight sleep.

🧸 Stay calm and consistent.

Easier said than done, right? But your calm presence is like a lighthouse in their little storm. Stay consistent with your routine and expectations, even when they test the waters.

One last hug (for you!)

If bedtime feels like a daily battle, please know it’s not a reflection of your parenting. It’s a phase, a developmental leap, and a call for connection, all wrapped in one tiny, sleepy package.

With time, patience, and a few gentle tweaks, you can help your toddler feel safe, calm, and ready for sleep.

And if you need some support along the way? I’m here for you. 💛

Reach out for a personalised sleep consultation, and let’s bring peace back to your evenings, together.

Learn more about my Nurture Sleep Support Program here

Did you find this blog post helpful? Don’t forget to share it with a parent who may need to read it.

Nicole Jayawickreme

Certified Baby Sleep Consultant and Registered Nurse (Neonatal Intensive Care)

I’m a certified sleep specialist, neonatal intensive care nurse, wife and a mother of 3 beautiful little children. I know first hand how important sleep is and I am here to help you and your family with my sleep programs so that you all can thrive.

I will guide and empower determined parents like you, to get the sleep you desperately need so that you have the energy to be the best parent that you can be!

Lear more about me here